Finding Inner Calm and Deeper Wisdom

Go Deep to Learn Who You Really Are.

Use Your Loneliness

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I hate to feel lonely. Don’t you?

Believe me, I have had some long stretches of loneliness in my lifetime. But in recent years, I’ve managed to solve that problem almost entirely. I say almost, because I’m not a hermit, and for my own mental health I need to have people around me some of the time. Or maybe a lot of the time. And, I especially need a life partner for several reasons—but now is not the time to discuss that.

What I discovered was How to Use Loneliness. And how to stay emotionally stable and even happy when I am lonely. It was a stepwise learning lesson for me. Here, I’m going to describe the first level of how I escaped the pain of Loneliness and its twin problem: Depression.

My huge discovery was using writing alternated with meditation. It was huge for me. It might not work for everybody, but it should work for most people. It’s so simple. I should have thought of this fifty years ago. Here’s what I do when I’m lonely.

Step one, believe it or not, is actually recognizing that I’m lonely. Sometimes I’ll mope around for a while, not feeling very good about life, then I’ll have a eureka moment. And recognize that I’m lonely!

Step two: I grab a pad of paper and a ballpoint. I start writing about whatever is on my mind. Or whatever in life is troubling me. Or maybe, I’ll just start writing about a favorite topic that energizes me.

Step three: When I reach a point in the writing where I can’t think of what to write next, I stop. I grab a favorite cushion and sit in Zen meditation for a while. That usually lasts no longer than twelve to fifteen minutes. Sometimes it will last longer, especially if I’m having a bad case of the blues.

Step four: Repeat the writing and meditation until I feel better. Or it’s time to take a shower and take a walk. Or read an interesting book. Or maybe treat myself to a healthy lunch. Or have a date with a special friend.

Why does it work? Writing is an excellent form of self-therapy. Writing will often let one part of your mind express something that another part of your mind didn’t know. Then, the meditation will let your mind process that knowledge and help heal a part of the mind that was hurting.

Another benefit of this process is that it turns loneliness into aloneness—which is being alone but feeling better about it.

Let me know if this works for you.

Become a Master

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ChablisBuddhaThe definition of a “master,” that is, a spiritual master, is a person who has had several enlightening experiences, at least two or three.

Second: In order to have enlightening experiences, you must learn to enter the true meditative state, which means sitting still and being awake, alert, free of drugs and alcohol, and most importantly without conscious thought (aka the Zen state).

Third: You must practice Zen meditation for 10 to 15 minutes every day. (Do it forever, which means at least until you die.) More than 15 minutes is okay, but not necessarily of value.

Fourth: Practice Zen faithfully and purposefully, learning over time to take your meditative state deeper and deeper.

Fifth: Sooner or later (and nobody knows how long you will need) you will become enlightened.

How to know if you’re enlightened: You will know. There will be no doubt. It is a euphoric event like nothing you’ve ever experienced before. You will discover your self-nature, meaning you will know who and what you are at the deepest level of your being without the masks and delusions created by your conscious mind. You will know your purpose in this life. You will experience profound inner peace (but only periodically, because you are still a human being).

Note: Please forgive the brief, terse way this is written. My goal was to impart the most important things I’ve learned, but in the fewest possible words. And in terms that are least likely to be misunderstood.

Namaste, ya’ll.

Written by Eduardo Mitchell

October 3, 2019 at 5:02 pm

Be Still and Know

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The Aborigines have known for thousands of years that “inner deep listening and quiet, still awareness” is a form of mindfulness and reciprocal empathy we can develop with the earth, each other, and the universe. Starting as early as 60,000 years ago, they had an intricate understanding of the ecology, and how living in harmony with it promoted their physical, spiritual, mental and emotional well-being. The same message has been repeated many times through the history of humankind. Be still. Listen.

Text from Bonita Grima; Photo credit: ANTAC

Written by Eduardo Mitchell

September 30, 2019 at 5:59 pm

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Getting Past Grief and Suffering

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My dear friend E: You told me recently about the passing of your father, and you described your terrible pain and suffering ever since then. Indeed from your description, you have been living with debilitating pain ever since, and you are not able to escape it. I have a few words for you that might help.

First and most importantly, you and your father had a long and deep relationship that created many years of joy. As in any loving human relationship, you and he knew all the while that, sooner or later, you and he would be parted by death of the physical body. This is true with everybody you love. It is also true for everybody I love. Actually, it is true for everybody.

However, long-standing love of such great depth goes deeper than just the physical body. In such a relationship, the human spirit that lives deep within one person establishes a connection with the human spirit deep within the other person. A simple way of saying that is: the two people develop a spiritual relationship.

From your own descriptions, I know that you have a spiritual connection with your father. However, your overwhelming grief and pain are preventing you from recognizing and using that connection. When you have a visitation from your father as you described, you must learn to get past your suffering and make yourself available to that moment. You must get past that pain and discover the joy of your connection with your father.

After all, so much of your father’s energy, especially his spiritual energy, was absorbed into you during all those years of his and your relationship. You are doing him and yourself a disservice by remaining “stuck” in your grief.

Your father’s love for you is real. And so is your love for him. There is no harm whatsoever in allowing yourself to spend time with him whenever future visitations happen. And you can use that as a time to look for the joy that you’ll find when you get past the pain.

Written by Eduardo Mitchell

July 9, 2019 at 2:23 pm

Impossible Dream?

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A few months ago, an unusual dream came to me during my early morning Angel Hour, I think it was about 4 a.m. and still dark outside. The dream was unusual in several respects, but most significantly it created a lasting impression in my mind. As we know, most dreams fade during the daylight hours. Often by late morning, I can’t remember anything about a dream I had during the night.

So maybe this wasn’t a dream after all. Rather, it might have been what could be called a “spiritual experience?” I think it must have come from somewhere deep in my own Human Spirit. In any event, a clear memory of it persists even today.

A young dark-skinned man was walking along a dusty road dressed in the white ceremonial clothing of a martyr. He wore a deadly suicide vest. His faced showed grim, determination. He was carrying out the plan he’d been trained for. But then, as he walked, he received spiritual Enlightenment. He stopped. The hard look of hatred disappeared from his face. He smiled. He removed the vest and threw it into a ditch. He turned around and headed back to his own village.

Later that morning, my conscious mind filled in the rest of the story. That would-be mass murderer, instead of carrying out the plan he had been indoctrinated for, returned to his home and to his family. He resolved himself to go to work and help his family and his people have a better life.

Is such a thing possible? Can people who have been brainwashed and indoctrinated as terrorist killers actually open their mind to receive enlightening knowledge? I’ve been thinking seriously about that possibility.

Written by Eduardo Mitchell

June 21, 2019 at 11:15 am

Let’s Start a New Chapter

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I’m happy to announce that my years-long ordeal of lower back pain is already fading into history. Eighteen days ago, as I write this, a team of skilled surgeons performed an amazing overhaul of my lower spine, and life is already taking a new direction. Before that, I’d had several years of steadily deteriorating conditions in the L2-L5 area of my back. I used yoga, meditation, chiropractic, and anything I could think of (except pain medication) to get me through those years. When I reached the point that I could see further deterioration leading to irreversible damage, I told the doctor to sharpen his knives and do his magic.

And magic it is, indeed.  A few months of physical therapy and gentle exercise will be needed to help everything heal and get the muscle strength back to normal. But I’m already well into the program.

The primary form of physical therapy is walking. Now I’m up to about 40 minutes of walking per day. Next weekend I’m cleared to jump in the pool and take an easy swim. And with the greatly reduced pain level, I’m beginning to feel a lot more motivated to write.

Written by Eduardo Mitchell

June 6, 2019 at 11:47 am

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There is Stress

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There will always be Stress. That is because Stress is a normal and natural part of the universe. There has always been Stress. Just the fact that we live on a ball of dirt and water, hurtling through space with gravity gluing us to its surface–is Stress. We might as well get used to it. But that doesn’t mean we have to continuously suffer from it.

The Problem with Stress is that we internalize it. We worry about it. We open our mind and allow it to come inside, where it proceeds to gnaw at us without mercy. The human mind has been doing that since we lived in trees. The answer to the Stress Problem is to NOT internalize it. Isn’t that easy?

Ah yes, that’s so easy to say, but not so easy to do. So, let’s break it down and make it a bit easier to do. “Internalizing” some external thing in our life actually and simply means “thinking about it.” If you think about it, you are internalizing it. If you don’t think about it, you’re not internalizing it.

This is where so many people say, “But not thinking about it means I’m just running away from the problem.” Thus, based on their idea of being mature and responsible, they think. And think, and think. And wear themselves out by thinking. Like a rat in a roundhouse, running around and around. Which is is a terrible form of self-torment, agony, suffering, and self-abuse.

Therefore, your clear solution to Stress is not thinking about whatever you have to worry about. Or, better yet, controlling your thinking machine so that it only worries when you want it to. I advise people to write down everything they are worried about, and then study that list for one hour at 7 p.m. Or at 10 a.m. in the morning. Or maybe for a half hour at noon. Whatever gives you the feeling that you’re being “responsible.” The rest of the time you have my permission to not think about all that stuff.

Written by Eduardo Mitchell

April 22, 2019 at 10:25 am